Friday, October 21, 2005

Friday Fragments

A weekly column promoting ADHD as an alternative lifestyle

  • Amazon.com reader reviews are occasionally very entertaining. I can see the advertising slogan now: Friends: The Complete Tenth Season - Not as gay as you expected!

  • The Hokies creamed Maryland 28-9 last night, and looked reasonably good doing it (despite a third quarter mini-game of Catch), and I didn't even notice any sportscaster fumbles on the name of our quarterback. Chris recently bought Jason a copy of World of Warcraft for his upcoming birthday, and they named their characters Mikus and Markal, in honor of sports commentators everywhere who cannot tell the Vick brothers apart.

  • I don't understand why songs from Star Wars are an integral part of pep band playbooks at every football game. The Marching Virginians were fairly low-key about it, using only the Imperial March. We had to play that retarded song every time the opponents' offense took the field. Last night, I think I heard the Maryland band play the complete symphonic score of the trilogy, although there could have been some Harry Potter or Shostakovich's Fifth Symphony mixed in there -- it all sounds the same.

  • I haven't mentioned any cats in a few days. Booty is liking this new cold weather trend because she can hide under the comforter near the heat vent. Underneath that picture is a sample of Sydney pretending to be one of those stick-on Garfield dolls from the 80s. Adding to this feline media smorgasbord is a movie of Amber tackling a toy and then getting tackled by Booty: (605KB WMV)

  • I'm a little underwhelmed by the second season of Lost so far. The Meanwhile on the other side of the island... approach to the first two episodes was annoying, if only because J.J. Abrams abused the device religiously on Alias.I'm also not buying the Michelle Rodriguez character one bit. Either she's a horrible actress or she's been given some off-camera direction to be as annoyingly hardcore as possible, because her character is like going to a student recital and listening to a ten minute marimba piece with one note in it. I have faith, at least, that there is an arc to this season, which is always a good thing. Even if a few episodes suck, it's nice to see things build and come together over the course of the season.

  • There are two weeks of reruns coming up, which is obnoxious. TV stations argue that people don't watch TV in certain weeks so they show reruns, which makes sense on holidays. But every other day of the week, more people would watch if they just had some entertaining new material to see. When I am independently wealthy following my lawsuit against McDonald's for marking a wet floor with a CUIDADO sign that had no English translation, I'm going to own and run a TV station that will have two seasons of original programming every year. Instead of taking a 24-show season and distending it to fill up the year, I will show it without breaks and then put on a different series for the other half of the year. All the hour long dramas that you can get into will show in the Fall/Winter, and all the annoying reality shows will take the Spring/Summer. Other open slots on the station will be filled with marathons of funny sitcoms and Whose Line Is It Anyways?. Tune in to BUB in about ten years -- it will have a very cool station ID in the lower right corner of the screen involving a stylized Booty.

  • While transcribing some intsrumental warm-ups for a local middle school, I realized that I have forgotten almost all of the ranges and transpositions for middle school wind instruments. I used to know the high/low/questionable ranges by heart. I guess this means that I need to write more pep band music until it all comes screaming back to me.

  • Readership of this site has nearly halved this week to about 50 viewers per day, and I don't even spend paragraphs convincing people to watch Alias anymore. What gives?

  • I have absolutely no opinion in the Kaine-Kilgore race and feel that neither one will do irreparable damage to the Commonwealth. If you think about it, every major controversial issue is so hotly divided that there will never be any success in resolving them during the short term of a Governor. No matter how much they pontificate about their views and what they will do, chances are very good that nothing will be accomplished by the end of their terms. All of the Kaine-Kilgore commercials annoy me (with typical tricks like cutting two unrelated words out of a newspaper story and then putting them together as a voice overphrase). What annoys me more are all the rubes who actually pay attention to the commercials, making them so effective.

  • I think Tom DeLay looks like a used car salesman . He's obviously guilty of all the vices they're pinning on him, but then again, so is every single politician out there. I would like to gain public office so I can release random statements about world events and appear on CNN.com as an expert opinion in stories with a little party ID next to my name. Rep. Brian Uri! (VA-I) said of the fire, "Our thoughts and prayers are with the victims of this horrific camping accident. I plan on introducing legislature in the Spring to curtail the runaway safety abuses of the propane industry. Unless they pay me more than you." I picked Independent as my party affiliation in the previous sentence because I doubt either real party would pick me. I think there's a Britney Spears song about this, "I'm not a Democrat, not yet a Republican".

  • This weekend is looking to be a busy one. Tonight I plan on doing some more painting in the guest room, followed by a low-key night out to be in with the local riff-raff. Tomorrow afternoon I'm going down to Dumfries for Nikki and Rod's wedding. Dumfries is such a great city name -- they should rename the county seat to Dumshake or Dumburger. On Sunday, I have an evening rehearsal for Mikado up in Maryland somewhere.

  • Have a good weekend!

  • But in the past, crowds have beaten up astrologers when their predicted demise failed to occur.
    Duo considered the Olsen Twins of White Supremacy
    He said if he was going to go down, he was going to go down in Larry Bird's jersey

    Yesterday's search terms:
    why are bridges painted blue, spider mam games, nymphomanic hippopotamus, beautiful leg quotes

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