Friday Fragments
What do you get when you cross a cinchilla with a molerat?
I decided not to do 12 of 12 
this month, because I wouldn't get the results up until Monday at which point no one would care anymore, and because today is probably going to be the least interesting day of my week.
Egg Drop Soup Week was a success. I've got the taste perfected -- now I just need to work on thickening the broth with more corn starch and making the dropped egg more silky and less rubbery. If this computer progamming thing doesn't pan out, I might be able to find work in a Good Fortune restaurant making the soups.Tragically you will not be able to find Chef Uri!'s Egg Drop Soup on the menu anytime soon because work is going quite swimmingly. I just had my annual performance review this month and got a tidy little raise to kick off my fourth full year of employment. I have not yet decided whether I will put this extra amount into my 401k, buy some more orphans for just pennies a day, or just blow it all on ho's. Blowing it all on ho's sounds like it has the best short-term rewards. Know any ho's?My anniversary at work also highlights the fact that I haven't lived in the one-bedroom apartment in Florida with the two inch cockroaches in three years. With those years of life experience under my belt like an anorexic mall Santa faking paunch with a pillow, I can confidently say that I made the right decision to not pursue my doctorate. There's already one Dr. Uri in the world -- we don't need two. Besides, in the technical world, certifications are just as handy as degrees.I'm still waiting for the results of my Java Certification which I submitted five weeks ago. I'm presuming this means that my project was so overwhelmingly innovative that the first grader had a heart attack from an overload of technical prowess and the second grader was attacked and killed by typesafe enumerations while trying to perform CPR on the first.
I should probably refresh my memory on CPR at some point since I've forgotten most of what I once knew. When I was a teenager, I did not know CPR because it was an essential Boy Scout skill -- I knew it because there was an old Sierra adventure game called Codename: Iceman where you were a CIA secret agent on vacation in Tahiti and you had to perform CPR on some chick at a volleyball game (who got cramps while swimming out to get the ball) before running off to pilot a secret submarine. I still remember typing > SHAKE AND SHOUT and > CALL FOR HELP into the parser . You had to type the exact commands in the right order in the given time or else the woman would die.It was very important that you not let the woman die because later that night the two of you would get your jives on in the woman's grass hut, and then later in the game you would discover that she too was a spy like you. I guess secret agents get lots of ho's.I haven't played an adventure game in ages, but I still regularly play World of Warcraft. The endgame is 100% uninteresting to me, but I'm still having fun leveling up characters and playing Capture the Flag in Warsong Gulch with my shadow priest, MASTER SERGEANT PLINKY. Blizzard really hit the jackpot in designing a geek-niche game that appeals to casual gamers and non-gamers alike. I expect that 80% of the U.S. will be playing by the year 2008, including Mike Catania, who will no longer be able to make dwarf jokes once he gets addicted, and Kathy Biddick, who will have to reactivate her account so she can bond with her brother and fiancé.The brother and fiancé in the previous statement are two separate people. Chris is marrying Kathy at the end of September, two weeks after Kelley marries Kathy on the day following my 27th birthday. So all in all, September will be a weddingful month.The Kathy's in the previous statement are two separate people . At least, I'm 75% sure of this. I'm 100% sure that the weddings are after my birthday.
Today is Mike Stafford's birthday, who married his high school sweetheart, who was not a Kathy, right out of college and disappeared into the frigid tundra of Massachusetts and was never heard from again. Tomorrow is Madeleine (LaPointe) Bittner's and Tiffany Combest's birthday. Happy Birthday, folks.I don't really have any plans at all this weekend. I've been pretty busy at work this week, so I'll probably take the time to watch some movies and be completely useless. Have a good weekend!SHAKE AND SHOUT. ESTABLISH AIRWAY.
Roboroaches and a tale of betrayal How to tell if your man likes kids She is healed!
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