Thursday, January 08, 2009

Weird Search Day

or "how I stumbled upon the URI! Zone"


  • Pee Pee Galore
    This is the name of the Bond girl in the childrens' adaptation of Goldfinger.

  • dreaming of kissing a coworker
    Last year, I wrote an article in which I did NOT kiss any coworkers, which probably wasn't much help to this lovelorn daydreamer. He or she should probably submit a story to the newly reopened Today at Work site, back from a two year hiatus and run by Justin, a former Zone reader.

  • centaurs humping
    I would imagine that the basic positioning of humping centaurs is similar to that of normal horsie humping, and there are plenty of images of THAT on Google. The only difference: the male centaur might try to cop a feel with his all-too-human hands during the act. (There was also a search query for "boinking spaniel" in my logs, but I figured one entry about humping was sufficient).

  • skipping school on friday, monday, tuesday and wednesday, is it obvious?
    Yes.

  • A Muppet christmas: letters to Santa beaker hot chick
    The "hot chick" is Petra Nemcova. In the show, Beaker uses Dr. Honeydew's Wish Machine and ends up with a girlfriend who talks just like him. He then uses the Machine again and vanishes with her for the remainder of the plot.

  • Enharmonic Panic Attack
    I'm stealing this as the too-awesome title of my next jazz chart.

  • onion booty.com big booty and pig breast cant stop
    I'm going to presume that this searcher has KTS (Keyboard Tourettes Syndrome), which results in an uncontrollable urge to type random vulgarity on Google. The "cant stop" at the end is obviously a cry for help.

  • reese witherspoon's nose damaged by drug sniffing
    Thankfully, there was no permanent damage to Reese's nose following her court-ordered community service.

  • bologna "desperate housewives " -italy -joe-bologna -joseph-bologna -pony
    I don't even have the first clue about what this person was possibly interested in, although he apparently filtered out any subsearches related to Italy and ponies.

  • craigslist missed connections home depot paint desk
    you looked pretty studly carrying two paint cans in each hand although i wondered why anyone would need that much puffin bay gray. when our eyes met i dyed a little inside but you varnished before i could say hello.

  • low backed dresses that reveal posterior cleavage images
    This could easily be an advertisement for that online quiz where you have to determine whether a shadowy crack is part of an ass or a chest.

  • looking for girls in christiansburg VA that posed nude on the web
    Dear searcher, please keep me posted on what you discover.

  • if it comes to you to watch the infint while the parents are gone give us games online to practice baby sitting
    I'm guessing this poor soul from Miami had just received a babysitting job, and used a strange combination of BabelFish and Google to translate this query from Spanish. If you are a Flash game developer and are looking for the next big thing, try creating an online version of Adventures in Babysitting -- there's a ready market.

  • Judge has sheriff arrested over jail food
    Jiu-jitsu defeats pit bull
    Driver warned of sexual gorillas in jail

    tagged as website, searches | permalink | 5 comments


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