Friday, June 02, 2006

Friday Fragments

A traditional Korean delicacy for your Friday morning blues

  • LOST actress, Michelle Rodriguez, avoided jail time for her DUI for the second time. She was sentenced in Hawaii and served one day of time before being allowed to walk, and then she was rearrested in California because she had been on probation from a previous DUI incident. She then served a few hours of a two-month term in an L.A. jail before being allowed to walk, after which she "celebrated her release at the Tropicana Bar". Someone needs to give that woman a pimp-slap back to reality. She's not a very good actress, she doesn't come off as someone I would invite to one of my rocking dinner parties in interviews, and she obviously has a false sense of entitlement because she's famous. They should have at least let her get beat up by a couple of thugs before they let her go.

  • I also think it's ironic that the last LOST episode which featured her prominently last season was called Two for the Road.

  • I started watching the fifth season of Alias on abc.com last night (who, by the way, has a very clean and snazzy interface for watching old episodes of all their major shows) and I'm on the third episode now. I can't yet tell if the season will be as good as previous ones, but I have learned that incorporating an actress' pregnancy into the storyline is trite and stupid, and that Rachel Nichols is far hotter than Jennifer Garner ever was, but not quite as hot as Mia Maestro. You'd think that in a real spy organization, they would take plain and homely people to be spies, because others would be less likely to notice them.

  • I smell a new Internet business in the making: uglyspies.com. At this site you'll be able to hire a homely, plain, or ugly person to blend in to your immediate surroundings to get dirt on your coworkers and relatives. You could also make ad money by putting a fake search page at ugypsies.com. Paranoia will rise because you'll never be able to tell if your ugly friend is observing your daily habits or just has an unfortunate visage.

  • Spies wouldn't be able to get much dirt on me despite my exotic lifestyle. Every night this week except for Thursday, I spent the evening outside weeding the garden beds. For those of you that live in big cities, weeding is when you dig up all the plants you yourself did not plant so they can grow back in the next day. As a result of my weeding, I now have a farmer's tan and some itchy sores on one arm where a spider must have bitten me. My arm looks like it has the syphillis.

  • The coming weekend looks just as exciting: I'll be doing some shopping for sundry goods and house stuff and might go into work one of the days. I'm hoping Alias will get good so I can get sidetracked for a whole day watching the entire season. If that doesn't pan out, I may go over to the Herndon day laborer center and make a little extra cash weeding gardens.

  • When I was in elementary school, we'd spend every recess picking dandelion heads and throwing them at girls on the playground. We called it the War of the Weeds and actually had strategies and attack plans and such. We also used to kick dandelions that had bees on them and then collect the stunned bees in jars. I believe our ultimate plan was to get enough for them to make a new beehive, but we always had to let them go at the end of recess. That's how kids in my day got their buzz -- none of this cough syrup and choking game nonsense.

  • Happy Birthday Amy Giraldi! Have a good weekend everyone!

    • Dodge Neons: Roomier than expected
    Up Next: the axeless pick axe
    Boy blows up house with deodorant

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