I finished a very interesting autobiography of Henry Mancini today, Did They Ask about the Music?, which I stumbled across in the library a couple days ago. I'd recommend it if you have any interest in Mancini, arranging, or film scoring.

This week's Movie Night selection was Orange County. Although it wasn't particularly good, it was occasionally funny and harmless entertainment. Last week's movie, Curse of the Jade Scorpion was a little bit better, although I find it amusing how Woody Allen writes his scripts so he's always the hypoteneuse of some love triangle. I guess it's just as ridiculous as Clint Eastwood starring himself as a geriatric sex symbol in his movies.

It's supposed to be in the 70s and 80s all week with scattered thunderstorms. My plans for the week are fairly low-key: I teach on Tuesday and Thursday, with a planning meeting on Monday. Then, my VT friend, Nikki, comes in to town on Thursday night to audition for the voice studio.

Booty is making a guest appearance on a new Alias tonight. Don't forget to watch her.

The plan backfired when on a practice run the bats attacked the wrong target, and set fire to a military airfield in New Mexico.
Male sweat brightens women's moods
Three die in attempt to get mobile phone from a latrine
Genesis of Bush's obsession with Iraq

Mocking the Busy administration and reelection campaign provides me with easy fodder for news updates. Since I'm full of strong opinions but too apathetic to do much more than go out and vote on Election Day, this can be my contribution to the world of politics.

Following last week's admission that hiring actors to portray the 9/11 firefighters in the controversial Ground Zero reelection ads was "cheaper and quicker", the latest buzz surrounds the faux news releases touting Bush's newest Medicare law . This was coupled with House Republicans using their committee websites to engage in useful discourse about John Kerry .

Meanwhile, The Bush-Cheney campaign has discontinued its poster generation tool after Bush enemies discovered they could use it nefariously to have their own slogan endorsed by Bush .

I've been watching the Daily Show in the evenings when I have the chance -- I'd forgotten how funny and on target it was. After a segment where they took a gay, a jew, a black man to see the revival of Fiddler on the Roof for a panel on anti-Semitism, they tied the gay marriage debate to the discovery of gay penguins at the zoo and referred to them as "chum-guzzling".

Yesterday's notable search terms:

nate shafroth, water quality pohick bay potomac river virginia, how were settlers encouraged to colonize maryland, 1955 walt disney crossword puzzle, erin lawson soprano, facts (pepsi island)

Last night we watched The Incredibles, which was an all-around excellent movie. The story was cliched enough to be humorous in parody while still having the obligatory kids' message. The graphics were especially good, even better than Finding Nemo, and water and hair were particularly well done. Besides all of that, it was funny, creative, and had a great score. The DVD set is 2-disc, and comes with tons of features, most of which we haven't seen yet. The outtakes are stupid and not up to par with outtakes on other animated movies, but some of the other stuff is pretty interesting.

Of the "new" generation of animated movies, this one ranks up pretty high on my list of favorites, with the Shreks, Finding Nemo, and the Toy Story's.

All the dead links from 2003 news updates have been cleaned up. There's also a new Alias tonight.

"I've outdone anybody you can name -- Mozart, Beethoven, Bach, Strauss. Irving Berlin, he wrote 1,001 tunes. I wrote 5,500." - James Brown

Movie Day

From IMDb:
uri! is the latest in a line of high production value biopics from the studio that brought you Ray and Walk the Line, documenting the life and times of musician-blogger, Brian Uri!. From his early days as a small Asian boy to his later years as an older Asian man, you will laugh and cry at the fecundity of human spirit. The talent slated to be in this movie include:

The Family
Young Brian . . . . . . . . Jonathan Ke Quan
Adult Brian . . . . . . . . Daniel Dae Kim
Old Brian . . . . . . . . . Pat Morita (through CGI)
Mom . . . . . . . . . . . . Sally Fields
Dad . . . . . . . . . . . . John Goodman
Ellen Uri . . . . . . . . . Lucy Liu
The Pre-College Years
Young Jack. . . . . . . . . Macauley Culkin
Young Kim . . . . . . . . . Dakota Fanning
Ed Cannon . . . . . . . . . Ryan Stiles
The College Years
Kelley. . . . . . . . . . . Owen Wilson
Dave McGarry. . . . . . . . as himself
Philip. . . . . . . . . . . Tom Cruise
Shac. . . . . . . . . . . . Luke Wilson
Doobie. . . . . . . . . . . Jon Heder
Jason Chrisley. . . . . . . Heath Ledger
Dave McKee. . . . . . . . . Richard Dreyfuss
Dan Shiplett. . . . . . . . Ryan Phillipe
Madeleine . . . . . . . . . Reese Witherspoon
Paige . . . . . . . . . . . Sandra Bullock
Nikki . . . . . . . . . . . Sofia Coppola
Liz . . . . . . . . . . . . Fran Drescher
Rosie . . . . . . . . . . . Rosie Perez
Jason Mirick. . . . . . . . Hugh Grant
The Florida Years
Mike Catania. . . . . . . . Adam Sandler
Kathy . . . . . . . . . . . Glenn Close
Alex. . . . . . . . . . . . Ben Stiller
Rob . . . . . . . . . . . . Matthew Lesko
Mark. . . . . . . . . . . . Philip Seymour Hoffman
Peter Spencer . . . . . . . as himself
The Adult Life
Anna Ahlbin . . . . . . . . The RockNatalie Portman
Ben Ahlbin. . . . . . . . . Bruce Willis
Kim . . . . . . . . . . . . Scarlett Johannson
Rachel McKenzie . . . . . . Joey Lauren Adams
Jaood . . . . . . . . . . . Jaleel White
The Millionaire Years
Alyssa Milano . . . . . . . as herself
Rachel McAdams. . . . . . . as herself
Jason Chrisley's Hot Tub. . as itself
Butler. . . . . . . . . . . Christopher Hewett

Coming to theatres this Summer!

Friday Fragments

packaging the detritus of my wisdom into easy-to-digest bundles

♣ I've managed to get a little painting in every day this week except for one, and paint fumes have now reached a critical level, causing me to feel high like a monkey dangling from a very tall tree.

♣ Though this analogy isn't particular good, it does allow me to reuse this picture of me one final time before I relegate it to the trash. Reuse means I get to expend less effort, which transitively means that I have more energy in reserve, for the day I'm pursued down a long narrow alley by an escaped lion. No one ever expects an escaped lion, and then CHOMP(y), they're breakfast. Doesn't it look like I'm hanging from a tree wondering if that lion is going to make me into breakfast?

♣ When I was constantly working from home at the end of last year (during Super Crunch Time, which isn't just a cereal from the 80s), I got in the habit of eating breakfast every day. Since then, it's been hard for me to revert back to my normal two-meals-a-day routine. Recently, I've been having a light snack at 10:30 and another around 2:00 in the afternoon, followed by dinner at 6. As a result, I have gained three pounds, and now almost exceed the weight of a British "stone". So long, coxswain days.

♣ Sometimes when I look back at my crew days, I realize that for every one great day where I truly enjoyed it, there were fourteen other crappy days where I just wanted to quit. I'm occasionally surprised that I actually did five full years of it. Then again, I probably got more out of it than those five years of undergrad.

♣ A deep thought I read recently, in relation to applying for a job: Having a degree only shows you can stick with something to the end, and certifications show off your memorization skills. Job experience is the only real measure of how capable you are, and even then it's not infallible.

♣ It's a good thing that none of you has a job as a bass-line guesser. Apparently Wednesday's Name That Tune contest is much, much harder than I expected it to be. I figured the winning entry would have 6 to 7 correct answers, but the high score of the moment seems to be around 5. I will not give out any more hints, but I may decide to increase the size of the prize to spur competition. Maybe some of the musical cripples can band together and form a corporation for the duration of the contest.

♣ It has just come to my attention that "musical cripple" is no longer politically correct. "Musicologist" or "Undergraduate Music Education Major" are both more acceptable.

♣ My weekend is pretty booked up at the moment -- I have Movie Night plans tonight, St. Patrick's Day plans tomorrow, stairway recarpeting plans on Sunday, and then I'm taking Monday off to recarpet the living room. It looks like I'm on track to finish the kitchen and living room by the end of the month, and then April will be "Do the Bathrooms" Month (not "Doo the Bathrooms" Month, because that's every day). After that I'll be done doing manly house stuff for a few months, though I will probably reconvene in October to turn the basement into a cosmic bowling alley.

♣ Have a great weekend! Happy Birthday Andy Norton on Sunday!

List Day: Ten Bathroom Habits

Good luck to Kathy, who defends her dissertation tomorrow!

If it's brown...

flush it down. (5 votes, 50.0%)


make it drown. (1 vote, 10.0%)


go to town. (1 vote, 10.0%)


send in the clown. (3 votes, 30.0%)

Museday Tuesday

As part of this feature, which I started in 2007, I compose a very brief work (under 30 seconds) inspired by a randomly generated title from an online word generator. The composition can be for any instrumentation, and could even be a purely synthesized realization that might not be possible to perform in the real world.

I work on the excerpt continuously for an hour and then post whatever I've managed to complete, even if it's a poorly constructed slum of a song supported by a foundation of droning double stops and abused tubas.

Corrugated: (adj.) Wrinkled, furrowed, ridged.

This excerpt is for a very simple combination of strings, percussion, and a synthesizer. I started out with a "rain on a corrugated roof" motif mixed with a little metric ambiguity and then found the beat.

Memory Day: Snapshots

This is me on my brand new He-Man bike in 1983. I have to say that the picture I drew here of the bike holds up pretty well to the real thing. You can tell that this is top quality workmanship, since the tires are made of plastic, and the He-Man trademarks are held on with black plastic ties.

Today, I can't even think of a valid connection between He-Man and bicycles -- it's not like you can pretend to be Orko while coasting down a hill on your training wheels. Had they sold swords, it would have been a much stronger product placement.

Answers Day

the obligatory recapitulation to Questions Day

What computer should I buy? - Evil Mike

Ever since camera, computer, and graphics card manufacturers decided to forgo sequential numbering schemes for their stuff, it's become impossible to compare products without an abnormal amount of research. The good news is that all new computers are good enough to play existing games, as long as you don't take the bare bones version of any pre-built package (so upgrade the graphics card one notch and get at least the middling processor).

For comparison, I have a Windows 7 64-bit machine purchased in January 2011. It has an i7 (2.93GHz) processor, 8GB memory, and an NVIDIA Geforce GTX 460 (1GB). It runs Skyrim and World of Warcraft at mid-to-high settings without any hiccups or issues.

Why haven't you gotten a smart phone yet? - Mom

I am on the computer so much that I don't want the Internet to be accessible when I'm not.

When you posted about how you floss, I realized that I do so the same way. What else should I be doing like you? - Doobie

By shopping at Costco on Saturday mornings and arriving 20 minutes early, I am always first in line, never have a wait, and am always leaving the parking lot just as the soccer mom caravan arrives. I divert water up to the shower head immediately instead of bothering with the tub nonsense, and then get in at the faucet end rather than the far end. I skim the headlines, business, and style sections of the newspaper, but try to read most of the local news. I tip as close to 20% as I can while still resulting in two zeros after the decimal point. I put on both socks, then both shoes. On busy roads, I always favor right turns and U-turns over left turns. I always enter the grocery store on the produce side and work my way down to the freezer section. I don't pay bills online if there is a convenience fee. I open all of the news stories from all of my news sites in tabs first, and then start reading. I warm up my trumpet with Stamp exercises. I try to befriend only winners.

If you could make two of your friends switch lives for a week for your amusement which two would you choose and why? - Mike and Chompy

Mike (of Mike and Chompy) and Ben Ahlbin, because Mike would work 28-days and come home to three daughters, while Ben could just hang out in Vegas and get rich with online coupons.

Which was better - 3 Ninjas or Surf Ninjas? How did both of these movies affect your life? - Steven

I have never seen a movie with a ninja in the title. I have only seen one movie with ninjas playing important roles in the story and I fell asleep (Kill Bill).

Weekend Wrap-up

We had a St. Patrick's Day party on Saturday night, which also ended up being a de facto Pi Day party with two dessert pie contributions. Both Kathy and Returned Mike were present and pool was played, eliciting comparisons to parties of yore from the Tallahassee days.

On Sunday, Rebecca went on a 12 mile hike to bulk up for her summer adventure in the Alps, while I stayed home, and occasionally relaxed. The rest of the time, I spent working on proposals.

How was your weekend?

Movie Day

It's the ten year anniversary of the time I cast the movie of my life. My casting choices have stood the test of time, although I'll need to make two changes based on actor deaths:

Jason Chrisley. . . . . . . Damon Herriman
Mark Connor . . . . . . . . Michael Chiklis

Also, I didn't know Rebecca at the time. Who do you think should play her in the movie?

LA Travelogue Day

Tuesday 3/6: Maia's first plane ride went as well as could be expected, and she was easily tied for least annoying baby on the plane. She slept for about 2 of the 5 hours in the flight. I had to watch Wonder Woman soundlessly on two other peoples' screens and decided that that movie looks dumb as hell. In LA, we got our rental car and drove through LA traffic to Topanga Canyon. We gave Maia lunch in the State Park and then did some grocery shopping while waiting for our AirBnB check-in. Around 4, we arrived at our two-room cabin, guarded by two big friendly dogs and up an incredibly steep driveway at the end of long, winding Puerto Rico-like roads. We made fish tacos for dinner and then the women conked out around 6 PM.

Wednesday 3/7: We had this day to ourselves so we did a morning hike at Corral Canyon in Malibu and walked along the beach a bit. We had lunch at Fish Grill where everyone was Jewish but us, and then headed back for naptime. In the evening, we met up with the Edwardses who were staying just up the road (within walking distance) and then drove down the canyon to Woodland Hills for dinner at The Stand. Staying in Topanga was great for the ceremony itself, but the town really had nothing convenient in terms of modern amenities and all of its restaurants closed before dinner time.

Thursday 3/8: On Thursday, we ran errands for the soon-to-be-wed, including trips to Costco for beer, Target for sodas, and Michael's for artsy garbage. In the evening, we went to the Rehearsal Dinner at a Maggiano's which glowed like a radioactive tumour on an otherwise creepy, abandoned mall.

Friday 3/9: Rebecca was doing wedding prep all day so I had Daddy Day Care in session, taking Maia for walks around the neighbourhood while improving my calf muscles on the hills. The public ceremony followed a private one for family (that I did not attend) and was very well-done. I enjoyed Mike and Annie's vows and the pleasant weather for the outdoor portions. I had to leave the dinner table do a little Maia wrangling to keep spirits up, but what little food I got was pretty good. Rebecca and Mike's brother gave toasts. In lieu of a first dance, Mike and Annie did a first performance with voice and steel pans backed by a little combo.

Saturday 3/10: Saturday was a quiet recovery day. We had a post-wedding pizza lunch at the Original Pizza Cookery with the couple and other out-of-towners because the newly wedded couple probably felt guilty about making us fly in from the better coast and wanted to make sure we had plenty of events. In the evening, we trekked to the Edwardses' house and had a dinner consisting of everyone's leftovers.

Sunday 3/11: Rebecca got sick on Saturday night, so we spent Sunday trolling through Woodland Hills for a non-sketchy Urgent Care that was also open on Sundays and accepted our insurance. We had a functional meal at Panera and took it easy. I also walked 5 cumulative miles on the Topanga hills with Maia while Rebecca napped.

Monday 3/12: Our trip home started with a wake-up call at 3 AM which sucked but also helped us get back on Eastern time. LAX security took us 22 minutes to get through and the flight home was breezy and easy. Thanks jet stream!

List Day: 8 COVID-19 Impacts in our Life

1. The line to get into Costco wrapped around the building last Friday (with an orderly queue enforced by two Loudoun County Sheriffs), preventing me from stocking up on corned beef and Guinness.


2. We ordered meals from our favourite local pizza place (Joe's Pizzaria) on two days in a row.


3. Rebecca did a 90 minute yoga class through her studio from the basement, streamed online over Facebook Live.


4. I did a 7 AM grocery run at Safeway on Sunday to find shortages in fresh greens, eggs, milk, and cleaning supplies. It was quiet, other than the ruckus over the stocker who had just run over his foot with a giant pallet of water and was awaiting an ambulance.


5. We cleaned our doorknobs, keys, wallets, and computers yesterday. Maia said, "Daddy likes to clean things!", which is true even outside of pandemics.


6. Rebecca's work is still in session while my division is on Work-At-Home duty (I've been home since Thursday night). Maia's "Just for 2s" school is now cancelled until Loundoun County Public School is back in session.


7. Maia has not seen her grandparents in over a week.


8. We switched our upcoming B&B vacation in the Shenandoah to an isolated cabin so we could take Maia with us and keep her away from the grandparent babysitters.

Are you still alive?

Internet Archive Day

Nineteen years ago today, on March 16, 2003, I created this website for my new friend in Tallahassee.