Friday, January 03, 2003

I left home yesterday around five in the morning and got on I-95 with the Yanni belting out open windows. The first leg of the trip into North Carolina was uneventful, and besides the odd catfish truck I was the only person on the road. It was around Rocky Mount that I nodded off at the wheel, since the road was straight and danger was nonexistant. The next thing I knew, there was a guttural screeching of gears and airhorns and a bright flash of sparks as I veered off the road and through an electrified fence. The last thing I remember was a herd of cows mooing like bovine cannibals around the car.

When I became conscious again, I found myself in a small barren room with a single incandescent light bulb swaying from the ceiling. I was handcuffed to a chair and an overbearing fellow with no neck who smelled like feet was glaring across the table at me. He fired a steady barrage of questions at me in a variety of Arabic dialects which I couldn't understand, although I did hear the words 'suitcase bomb' occasionally. The interview went much quicker when Islaac realized I could speak English and we quickly worked things out. I had breached the perimeter of a top secret army installation somewhere north of Florence and they suspected me of being a suicide bomber (albeit one who hadn't done a particularly good job).

Once they realized I was just a student, they fixed up my car and sent me on my way, anxious to avoid negative publicity, or any publicity at all for that matter. Luckily, there was minimal damage to the bumper of my car, and all my belongings were still inside (except for the computer, which I got back after they had scanned it thoroughly). I arrived in Tallahassee only a few hours late, after being tailed by a government SUV through South Carolina and most of Georgia. It was definitely a trip that I'll never forget.

Today's Maxim: It's okay to lie when the truth is boring.

Also, there's a few new pictures on the Photos page.

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