Friday, January 17, 2014

List Day: 5 Brief Childhood Memories

  • My dad would sometimes get frustrated during home improvement projects. My favourite exclamation to hear was always, "Shitbird on Tuesday!"

  • Plain potato chips were the go-to ingredients for covering every type of casserole. It was a little weird, but allowed me to skip the casserole part by mostly serving myself potato chips.

  • We were not allowed to put our stuffed animals in the back window of the family car because, "When you brake suddenly or get into an accident, every single thing in the car that's not nailed down becomes a deadly projectile".

  • My parents always used fake butter spreads that were impossible to spread. It would either fall off the knife immediately or punch a giant hole in the toast.

  • I once brought home a puzzle worksheet full of abbreviated phrases like "54 C in a D" (which becomes "54 cards in a deck"). The whole family was stumped for a while on "3 BM (SHTR)", and my dad suggested that the answer was "3 bowel movements on the shitter".

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