Wednesday, June 08, 2011

Weird Search Day

or "how I stumbled upon the URI! Zone"

  • does my homeowners insurance cover if chipmunks destroy my camper
    Generally, homeowner policies do not cover acts of war -- I think you have a pretty good case unless an investigator can discern that the chipmunks in your area recently became insurgent or started bearing arms, and the only known case of that happening was in late 2009, following the release of Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel.

  • Are scabies prevalant at massage parlors?
    I'm not really sure if I should delve too deeply into the reason that Yahoo search puts me in 6th place for this search. This is the first I've heard of a scabies phenomenon at massage parlors, but I have very little firsthand knowledge to work from. I do know that avoiding the Happy Endings will help you avoid babies, and avoiding unusually aggressive massage therapists might reduce your chance of rabies.

  • cheats for the environmental science merit badge
    The requirements for Environmental Science really were a pain in the ass, so I'll let you in on a little secret that works for many science or outdoor-themed merit badges: Get them at summer camp and it's really more about attendance than doing any work. I think I earned four merit badges in a week at a Penn State Science Camp, and I definitely didn't do any actual Space Exploration.

  • ihop christiansburg,VA kristy
    So at some point in your college career, you rolled out of bed on a Sunday afternoon with a terrible hangover, and decided to chase it with a case of premature death at the local IHOP. There, you met the most attractive waitress you'd ever seen sober, named Kristy, but unfortunately the receipt didn't have her last name (specifically to thwart scraggly stalkers like yourself). In this day and age, your next stalking step would be to get on Google and hope that she mentions she works at IHOP on her Facebook profile, or maybe as the headline on her LinkedIn account.

    I would guess that the success rate of this approach is 0%, yet a query for "american flatbread ashburn emily" came in just days later.

  • analogy beethoven is to mozart as beverly cleary is to blank
    Beethoven is to Mozart as Beverly Cleary is to Madeleine L'Engle. She wrote thicker books with more serious content, parts of which aren't as important as she makes them sound. Plus, she lived to the age of 89, so she probably didn't hear as well towards the end.

  • urizone for yeast infection
    Strongly discouraged. My website would be tied up in pharmaceutical tests for years if I tried to market it as more than the most inspirational blog in the known universe.

  • Yum! lobbies Kentucky to allow fast food purchases with food stamps
    How to spot a psychopath
    Aggressive coyote terrorizes senior center

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