Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Prescription drugs have taken over the commercials on nightly television. "This is Bob" cable commericials notwithstanding, I saw five prescription drug commercials in the space of one hour on Sunday night. The commercials and their messages played so often and ran together so much that it was like a contrapuntal elegy of non-fatal side effects and scabrous limbs.

Evidently there's a new prescription drug for chronic dry eyes. Now, millions of Americans will run to their doctors based on misdiagnosed allergies and hypochondria. I'm sure there's quite a few people out there with legitimate dry eye problems which are severe enough to warrant a trade-up for a risk of heart attack, inverse constipation, and genital blistering, but everyone else should try out some home remedies first, like blinking.

The plague of judges is fast approaching
I got out and I was very upset because I realized that I was showering in our own crap [and I didn't notice for two months becuase I figured, you know, well water is brown]
How to get in the Army while on drugs and without a diploma

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