Wednesday, November 16, 2011

Quick Tips Day

With the modern American's schedule packed tighter than a boneless sardine run through a FoodSaver, the savvy time manager needs to know when the warning labels on products truly point to dangerous situations and when they're just tacked on to avoid frivolous lawsuits. Here are a couple tips to help maximize your productivity.

Tip #1: Preempt common cold conditions with a squirt of lotion
That first morning you wake up with an unusually dry throat can be filled with dread, as you realize that a full-fledged cold is only hours away. No one has time for humidifiers and an endless swarm of cherry lozenges, but it is a little-known secret that Lubriderm is perfect for combating a dry throat (the throat is just skin, but on the inside!) Just squirt a fat dollop into your mouth and swallow. Plus, it's non-comedogenic, which either means that it won't clog your pores, or it's not very good at stand-up comedy.

Tip #2: Save time and prevent wrinkles by ironing in your shirt
You can spend hours trying to iron out the wrinkles in your dress shirt on an every day ironing board, but it's really a one-size-fits-all affair. The shape of an average ironing board is nothing like the shape of your shirt, so you'll waste time and energy shifting the shirt around every few seconds. A more logical person would realize that your torso is generally the perfect mold for the shape of your shirt. Simply put on your shirt first, and you can iron it with one hand while brushing your teeth or having a bowl of cereal with the other hand. The natural fit of your body will result in the most visible parts of the shirt looking the sharpest (your bulging pecs) while not wasting any time on the parts that no one will see anyhow, like the tails that get tucked into your pants.

Woman dies from 15-year-old gunshot wound
Mario's raccoon suit enrages PETA

tagged as random | permalink | 4 comments


Previous Post: Museday Tuesday


Next Post: Review Day

 

You are currently viewing a single post from the annals of URI! Zone history. The entire URI! Zone is © 1996 - 2020 by Brian Uri!. Please see the About page for further information.

Jump to Top
Jump to the Front Page


November 2011
SMTWHFS
12345
6789101112
13141516171819
20212223242526
27282930
BIRTHDAYS
BLOGLOG
07/03
06/15
12/11

OLD POSTS
Old News Years J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
J F M A M J
J A S O N D
visitors since November 2003