If you were wondering why I left such a diminutive update on Monday, I'll tell you now. I posted that I was running a little late. While that wasn't exactly a lie, I feel somewhat duty-bound to explain the whole story...

As you may well be aware, I typically awake at 4am to get ready for work. Since I went to bed extra early the night before (6pm) I woke up before my alarm went off. At 3:26am I got out of bed and made a simple breakfast. By 3:32am I had finished eating my Belgian waffles, eggs benedict and papaya smoothie (made fresh from the papaya trees I had planted in the greenhouse [which I had built from matchsticks, dental floss, some old 2-liter sprite containers and gum] the day after I moved in). From 3:33-3:34 I did absolutely nothing. I felt a little guilty taking that much time off but I also got some good thinking-time in. I took a quick shower and while I was drying off I noticed Booty acting especially crazy. I fed her and took 68 pictures, which I then put online (links below). By now it was about 4:15 and I still had an extra fifteen minutes before I had to fight the idiot drivers on my way to work. While I shot some movies of Booty playing with various household objects (viewable below) I watched three episodes of Alias from the first DVD in 8x fast-forward. The build up was still a little slow for my taste, but it's still the best show on TV.

It snowed a little last night, which always seems to bring out the worst drivers in droves. I managed to avoid no less than four accidents (good thing I filled up my tires the extra .01 psi this morning on my way out). Arriving safely at work at 4:59am, I watched the sunrise while my computers boot(y)ed up. My morning was occupied by inane meetings, where people much less intelligent, motivated and generally inefficient than me blathered on about topics covered by my 8th grade diorama, aptly titled: A Functional Replacement for FORTRAN. With the meetings over, I adjourned back to my desk and chewed the fat with Kathy via Instant Messenger. She had just informed me of some hot Florida-gossip when, simultaneously, sixty-six people messaged me for help with their computers, all from FSU. Although it cut into my lunch hour, I was able to answer all of their questions by avoiding small talk completely. After lunch, my supervisor dropped a bomb on me: he needed me to rewrite the code for some new 'missile defense project'. Fortunately, I had estimated such a task during my 3:33-3:34am brainstorming session and was able to complete the task in 12 minutes, not including the time I spent on eBay, purchasing a signed lithograph of all the Alias cast members. On my way out, one of my co-workers, let's just call him "Guy", asked me I'd mind jumping his car. Lacking jumper cables, I had no choice but to fashion a makeshift one out of some paperclips, his beta fish (Cyrus) and parts from his old Packard Bell monitor. The successful roar of his motor reminded me I needed to renew my Eagle Scout status. I drove up to the headquarters in D.C. on my way home but only after completing the seven good deeds required. All were simple enough, save the one where I had to actually cure a prostitute with Hepatitis C. While I did have the appropriate serum in my glove compartment, it seemed the populous of Washington, D.C. was largely a syphilis and Hep. B bunch.

Returning home, I made my roommate and her beautiful sister dinner. I went all out, hunting the game hen and truffles myself. On my way back from the forest, I stopped at Costco. to buy another 480 pack of RC Cola just in case we needed a little extra with dinner. After doing the dinner dishes, I finally completed my 163 symphony as well as the pep band arrangement (you can listen to it hear [hah!]). I then wrote a couple more BattleNet reports (follow link at the bottom). After writing drill for next year's VT Marching Band show (URI: The Epic Saga!) I completed my Valentine's Day, Easter, misc. birthday and Christmas shopping online. Noticing it was getting late, I watched the 8pm news and hit hay, falling asleep to Coldplay.

Today's guest entry was written by Mike Catania .

Yesterday's notable search terms:

Who's got the Booty, define efficiency, FORTRAN diorama