Friday, August 26, 2011

Friday Fragments

why you can have nice things

♠ When the earthquake struck knocked politely on my lawn, I was busy in the kitchen installing outlet covers. One variety which covers a dimmer switch and socket next to each other was not available in stores and had to be ordered online -- this type is called a "2-gang 1 rocker 1 duplex" cover, which incidentally sounds like a very good pilot concept for a sitcom in the ghetto.

♠ Now that the earthquake has finished trending, I'll have to come up with my own original content to milk for website traffic again. Faux catastrophes like a Mineral earthquake are perfect for my mock mock tag, which has been woefully underused this year.

♠ The earthquake and its two aftershocks, Steve Jobs and CmdrTaco, overshadowed much bigger news: one of our own readers, whose name starts with a "D" and rhymes with "BOOBY" is a new dad as of August 18. Congratulations! Based on previous experience with OPB (other peoples' babies), Ethan Patrick Fraker is currently the size of a Denis Wick euphonium mute (stone-lined), but plenty more valuable on eBay.

♠ I have never bought or sold anything on eBay, although once I went canoeing on a wee bay. I guess I don't really see the draw of bidding on weird stuff on the Internet, which is odd given the exorbitant number of hours I've wasted on the auction house in World of Warcraft.

♠ WoW is getting boring again -- It's very easy to login and waste time, but playing is more out of familiarity and lack of a better game than fun or addiction. I may let the subscription lapse in September and drop those eight million gigs of patches into the Recycle Bin.

♠ Speaking of recycling, our office is plastered with signs advertising "Single Stream Recycling". I suppose that means we can put all our cans and bottles in the same bin, and then someone will dump it all into the same creek behind the building. This should not really impact my recycling habits because I was never big on segregation in any arena.

♠ There are no plans for the weekend, because apparently we're due to get peed on by a giant hurricane named Irene. I have a new strategy for stocking up at the grocery store though -- while all of the other rubes are fighting over milk and toilet paper, I plan on hitting all of the less popular aisles. We should be able to get through this weather event just fine with a bag of charcoal briquets, roach spray, cold medicine, dill weed, romance novels, and cake frosting.

♠ Have a great weekend!

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