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News Archive - 11/2003 Saturday, November 01, 2003
Take a look around and see what you think. Questions and comments can be directed to the Comments button in the lower right corner of this news post, or to the Forum. You can also contact me directly at brian@urizone.net or at my old e-mail address, which still works indefinitely. This page looks much better if you turn "Underline Links" off in your browser, but to each his own. In the coming weeks, I'll be scraping the HTML barnacles off the four hundred odd pages contained in this site for a clean and standards-based layout (I've already finished a few sections). I am also open to suggestions for new features since I can now use PHP and mySQL on this site. permalink
| 2 comments Sunday, November 02, 2003
You can see new pictures from Halloween on the Photos page under "URI! Pictures", and I've added some new cat pictures as well (obviously under "Cat Pictures"). Women disarm man with a ham sandwich "The weapon seen on the X-ray machine turned out to be a plastic .38-caliber revolver, intended to help one of the women portray Alias television character Sydney Bristow at a Halloween party." Sydney would have been able to sneak the gun in.permalink
| 1 comment Monday, November 03, 2003
The Hokies obliterated #2 Miami on Saturday night, 31 - 7. With only two undefeated conference teams left, it's a toss-up as to who the BCS computers will pick for the Sugar Bowl if someone else loses. I've updated both the Archive and Links sections of the site with the latest and greatest in formatting and clean code. If you find any errors there, please let me know. permalink
| 0 comments Tuesday, November 04, 2003 I've gotten in the habit of writing updates the night before they're posted, which is what's kept me daily for so long now. The only problem with this approach is that topical news is either really early or a day late. My latest contribution to the world of arranged music: The Theme from Mash for brass quintet and voice, great for your next Mash-themed holiday party. Listen to it on the Music page under Miscellaneous. I'm working on a way to link straight to pages in the Zone from here, but until then, you'll have to take the extra step and click on the Music link above. The Olio section has been cleaned. Girls pummel man who exposed himself Magical flying boulders Yahoo writes good headlines When not to sing "I Shot the Sheriff" Cats demonstrate geometric replicationWednesday, November 05, 2003
Politics would be more interesting if everyone were a single-issue candidate like this one. No word on whether the government would be more or less efficient though. The sad part is that this candidate got almost 2,000 votes (1%)
Video games are addicting Where to go when you need an alibipermalink
| 0 comments Thursday, November 06, 2003
Without having seen the third movie, I'm of the opinion that the first movie was mildly interesting with good special effects, but far too pretentious for its own good. The second was incoherent filler that should never have been picked up off the cutting room floor. Any movie where Keanu Reeves plays a futuristic Jesus figure has to be treated with some level of skepticism. In the picture above, you can see a variation on one of his acting techniques, "stoic in the rain", which is companion to "stoic", "incredulous", "straining at the stool", and "attempting to form a complete sentence". Watch the movie and see how many of his excellent techniques he employs. I have to admit that he was good in Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, most likely because it didn't require any acting on his part. He could just be himself.
In conversation, Reeves is highly articulate, though he peppers his speech with dude-like "yeah, mans" and the occasional "most certainly."
Cell phone driver dies by crashing into cell phone storepermalink
| 0 comments Friday, November 07, 2003 Kent Kennan, composer and pedagogue, passed away at 90 a couple days ago. He was best known for his books on Counterpoint and Orchestration, as well as the infamous Sonata for Trumpet and Piano that every undergraduate trumpet performer must perform at least once in their career.
The About, Photos, Art, and Words sections have been cleaned and revamped. I even updated the formatting on the oldest Starcraft battle reports, although I kept the latest Warcraft reports as they were, since they already match the site's blue ensemble. Teacher taught swear words in religion classSaturday, November 08, 2003 Food preparation and clean up would be so much better if cheese weren't so sticky and grease weren't so greasy. The Games section has been revamped. Man admitted to womens' prison Playing games at work may be good for youSunday, November 09, 2003 I spent the weekend down in Colonial Beach. Now I'm back and preparing a whole chicken for boiling. Stay in school and don't do drugs. Monday, November 10, 2003
Unfortunately, the world will probably still be in the dark on the quality of the show, since it was a forgotten slice of ham in the exploitative sandwich that was Saving Jessica Lynch on NBC and The Elizabeth Smart Story on CBS. New ads postpone the inevitable doldrums of the Matrixpermalink
| 2 comments Tuesday, November 11, 2003 There's a feature missing from Mozilla Firebird's Preferences console concerning the cache. If you want your browser to compare new pages for changes more often, do the following:
I have mine set to 1 with good results. Happy Birthday Kelley! Cow falls in swimming pool Mother to give baby to gorillas Wife kept husband in bathroom for 3 years Catching a thief with your teethWednesday, November 12, 2003
In other news, Disney is halting all its traditional cel-shading work in favour of 3D computer animation
The Mouse that ate Public Domain Naked Sushipermalink
| 0 comments Thursday, November 13, 2003 Operation Iron Hammer is such a trite name. No doubt the US wanted a correlation to the previous Operation Iron Hammer, a German sabotage operation in World War II that was rendered ineffective before it even began when 18 aircraft were destroyed at a single airbase. I'm sure the military inspired their troops with this story last night before setting out. Happy Birthday Rosie! Activists angered by girl scout's beaver trap Nude trucker barely escapes injuryFriday, November 14, 2003 Sometime in the past couple days, the corroded lip of the garbage disposal pulled away from the sink drain, leaving a nice inch wide gap for water and assorted food scraps. Last night, it finally overflowed in the sink cupboard, oozing brown carrots onto the floor and solidifying two large boxes of dishwasher soap. Luckily the maintenance guy was here within fifteen minutes of the call and replaced the entire disposal in about ten minutes, free of charge. Good thing everything in the apartment is so modular. Where to go when people scare you but ugly computer graphics don't Eaten missionary's family get apology Man says he was sold pickup against willSaturday, November 15, 2003 I've revamped the Music section and added a page for a new arrangement of God Bless America for brass quintet. I think I'm in the mood to write a jazz chart now. Gigolo school raided for overcharging its students 'Boob job' cash burnt Radio station fined over dry ice stuntSunday, November 16, 2003
Tragic end for remote control donkeys Taxi driver glued to wheel in stick-upMonday, November 17, 2003 The cold weather seems to have reversed the polarity of traffic, as all the slowest drivers are camping in the left lane on my way to work. I just noticed that Eudora 6 has been released for a couple months now. I gave Thunderbird a quick run, but gave up on it after finding that all my legacy mailboxes did not translate well. I've got too many mail archives stored in Eudora to make the switch worthwhile. Topics so difficult they require a seminar How to get a wife You know China is not friends with us. They're trying to get back at us. What's the best way? Teach kids when they're young to hate. It's scary.Tuesday, November 18, 2003
Hanging corpse admired as sculpture Southern drawl defeats voice recognition programspermalink
| 0 comments Wednesday, November 19, 2003
A new Costco has opened at the intersection of Route 28 and Route 50, just 6.4 miles away from the existing one. Now I have a convenient stop along my trip home from work where I can mingle with the midday yuppy housewives who clog up lines with two overflowing carts of useless bulk goods (like designer bottled water) and then abandon their carts in the middle of the parking lot for the servant class to corral. "I really didn't know there was a chopstick in my eye," Ng said. "I am feeling better now." Reuters steals newsworthy items from my page.Thursday, November 20, 2003
It has been programmed as a predator. It is evolving swiftly, becoming more deadly with each passing hour. Every attempt to destroy it has failed. And we are the prey. The dangers of Costco Asked about parents who let their children go to Neverland for sleep-overs, the sheriff responded, "My advice is don't do it." Unguarded lyrics embarass Eminempermalink
| 4 comments Friday, November 21, 2003
Get Neutered, It Didn't Hurt Clay Aiken Teacher suspended after nauseating experiment A man and a pay phone were rushed to a hospital...and other jokes.Saturday, November 22, 2003 Yesterday in the men's bathroom, there was some visitor talking on his cellphone in a stall. Sunday, November 23, 2003 I've added a minor feature that will allow you to get to any page in the Zone directly -- useful if you found an interesting article and want to link it. The method involves adding two strings to the end of the URL, one for the section of the Zone and one for the page's ID. The ID is either the name of the HTML file or the ID of the generated content (on the Games page for example, every Doom map has its own ID but not its own HTML file). You can find any file's ID by moving your mouse over it in the Menu and looking at your status bar. Here are some examples: [This method no longer works. Links have been removed.] I haven't yet figured out the best way to do this with the Photos, Music, Words, and Art page because they have sub menu pages, but those sections should be available by direct link sometime this week. This means that I can now feature old pages when I have nothing new to report permalink
| 0 comments Monday, November 24, 2003 Severe Page Update from the National Weather Service ...SEVERE PAGE UPDATE NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE CENTREVILLE VA 157 PM EST MON NOV 24 2003 A STRONG LACK OF INGENUITY CAUSING VISITORS TO DROP VERY QUICKLY IS MOVING THROUGH THE SITE. A LACK OF ANYTHING USEFUL TO REPORT WILL CAUSE VISITORS TO DROP TO NEAR 0 OR BELOW BY THIS EVENING. IN ADDITION... ALIAS WAS PRE-EMPTED LAST NIGHT FOR A WASHINGTON REDSKINS GAME WHICH WAS ALREADY SHOWING ON ESPN. THE NEW EPISODE OF ALIAS EVENTUALLY MOVED INTO THE AREA AROUND 220 AM EST. TRAFFIC CONTINUES TO MOVE PAST THE APARTMENT, WITH SOME CARS GOING UP TO 50 MPH. USE CAUTION WHEN TRAVELING THIS AFTERNOON AND EVENING.... Tuesday, November 25, 2003
Wednesday, November 26, 2003 We had a little pre-Thanksgiving get together last night with about eight friends from assorted venues. Anna had received two free turkeys from work, so we decided to roast both of them rather than let one go to waste. There's now a ton of leftovers in the fridge, probably enough to last for a couple weeks. I'm going down to Barboursville tomorrow for Thanksgiving dinner at my sister's fiancé's parents' house, so there will probably not be an update until I get back on Friday. Putting rattlesnakes in your mouth for fun and profit Master/Slave banned in LA Putting Karate to Good UseThursday, November 27, 2003 Happy Thanksgiving! Scout leader shows how not to light a fire Gravity doesn't like the KKK Bush destroys the royal garden Crazy man on a bulldozerFriday, November 28, 2003
Speaking of computer books, I read The Career Programmer: Guerilla Tactics for an Imperfect World by Chris Duncan a month ago, but never got all the way to the end. Though it had some good information on working in real-world business environments, the tone of the book was oppressively bleak and the author used the same tired joke every fourth page. Next on my reading list is Practical Java by Peter Haggar which just arrived today along with a batch of Christmas presents. Don't deep fry your turkey.permalink
| 3 comments Saturday, November 29, 2003
DC-256 (884KB) Powershot G5 (1.9MB)I've also added the last of the DC256 pictures to the Cats page in the Photos section. This new camera can do short videos, so soon you'll be able to experience Booty-wrestling first hand! Update: It's Booty! Sunday, November 30, 2003
I'm having fun with this new digital camera, and I've made some more cat movies for kicks: Booty Jumps, AVI 3.24 MB Booty Purrs, AVI 1.33 MB Kitty and the Lamp, AVI 6.63 MBIf I ever get around to actually making decent movies, I'll look into compressing these into a smaller format. Hunter turkeyThe newest news on the front page is always at the top. Archived news is in chronological order. You can always contact me at The entire URI! Zone is © 1996 - 2008 by Brian Uri!. Please see the About page for further information. |
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